Saturday morning there was a big dilemma in my bathroom, but I suppose it really started on Friday night.

You see, that’s when I found the toothbrush on the bathroom counter next to the sink.

 

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It looked like my toothbrush, but I thought I had put mine away already. However, now that I am in my mid-40’s, my kids constantly point out that my old memory isn’t as sharp as their young brains. Therefore, I figured I must have only thought I put my toothbrush away.  So, I picked it up, threw it in the toothbrush drawer on my toiletry organizer, and went to bed.

That was Friday night, when all was still well with the world.

Saturday morning, everything fell apart … sort of.

Jon couldn’t find his toothbrush. He looked high and low, but to no avail. His toothbrush could not be found. Several minutes into his desperate search, he asked me if I had seen his toothbrush. I hadn’t.

At least, I thought I hadn’t.

Then it hit me. Maybe that toothbrush by the sink wasn’t actually my toothbrush after all. What if it really belonged to Jon?

Sure enough, when I opened up my toothbrush drawer, there was one tube of toothpaste and two nearly identical toothbrushes.

Identical brands. Identical styles. Even the colors were oddly close. One was a sort of lime green and the other was a slightly darker, more tealish green.

Did I have lime green toothbrush? Or maybe mine was the teal blue one? I couldn’t remember.

Unfortunately, Jon couldn’t either.

He tried laying each toothbrush in his toiletries to see which one looked right. He couldn’t see any difference between the two.

I tried picking each one up and looking in the mirror to see if one appeared more correct than the other as I held it in my hand. I couldn’t tell. In fact, that little experiment only made me more confused about which toothbrush actually belonged to me.

It was no use trying to figure it out. Our toothbrushes were hopelessly mixed up.

But perhaps the biggest shocker for me was the realization that even after seven years of marriage … sharing drinks, tasting each other’s food (using the same utensil),  and kissing on a daily basis … there was no way on God’s green earth that I would even consider for a brief moment sharing a toothbrush with this man. Not even for one morning. That would definitely be taking germ-swapping too far!

Item #1 on Saturday’s to-do list:

Buy new toothbrushes!

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Oddly enough, this is not the first time I’ve had issues with toothbrush sharing. In fact, one of my mother favorite stories to tell involves me, my siblings, and a red toothbrush.

To really understand the story, you must first know that my mother staggered our bedtimes.

Give me a moment to take a rabbit trail here…

Why on earth would you stagger bedtimes? This just lengthens the amount of time it takes you to get everyone into bed. I used to think this was the way it had to be done, like it was some unwritten parenting rule. And then I had five children. Staggered bedtimes? Putting one child down every half hour? That lasted about two nights, and then everyone got the same bedtime. 

Anyway, back to my mother’s version of the toothbrush story …

One night she happened to be in the bathroom when my little sister brushed her teeth with a red toothbrush. Half an hour later, she noticed my brother brushing his teeth, also using the same red toothbrush. (You can guess where this is going, right?) Yep, half an hour later, I brushed my teeth … with a red toothbrush.

Apparently, we all liked red, so we all claimed the red toothbrush.

To hear my mother tell this tale, you would think we were quite old when this happened. But, I’m thinking it’s more likely to have happened when we were all rather young. Perhaps I was six years old, which would make Reid about four and Brooke around two. I guess I could have been as old as seven or eight. I realize that six years old is plenty big enough to know better than to share a toothbrush. But I am guessing that I didn’t know I was sharing a toothbrush with my siblings. After all, we had staggered bedtimes, w which meant staggered teeth brushing times as well.  Therefore, it’s safe to assume I had no idea which toothbrush my brother and my sister were using.  At least, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

(A little side note:  This is yet another good reason to send all children to bed at the same time. By doing so, you will ensure that your children will not be able to use the same toothbrush … or if they do, a fight will break out. Generally, children do not willingly share anything, including toothbrushes. Now, back to the story … )

Obviously, my mother was extremely appalled to discover her children were into toothbrush sharing. Being a good and conscientious mom, she couldn’t let this horrid habit continue. The next morning my mother went straight to the pharmacy and bought three brand-new toothbrushes. A blue one for Brooke. A red one for Reid. A purple one for me (Paige).

This was the start of the color system.

Eventually, the color system grew to include many areas of our life, from plastic drinking cups to school supplies. If my mother had to buy three of any item, and there was even the slightest chance we would fight over which item belonged to which person, she color-coded. Brooke always got blue. Reid always had red. Usually I had purple … but sometimes I ended up with pink, which caused me great grief because pink was about the last color I wanted associated with my name.  (Even back then, I was grateful I wasn’t a boy named Patrick.)

(Here’s a Parenting Tip: The color system only works if you name your children so that it is easy to match them with a color. I actually tried to implement it with my five children, but there aren’t any colors that match up with names starting with J, M, or N.  Still I was determined to use this idea, so I randomly assigned colors. Naturally, I forgot which child I assigned which color, and they fought over who got the “cooler” colors. Then there was a period of time when all of them wanted orange to be their color, and they fought over orange items daily. Oddly enough, no one’s name starts with O!  So while I might not see the brilliance of staggered bedtimes, my mother had a distinct advantage over me with her implementation of the color system.)

The color system worked wonderfully, and I am sure it simplified my mom’s life in many ways. Now if a blue cup was left on the kitchen counter, my mother instantly knew who forgot to put it in the dishwasher. Blue = Brooke. If there was a purple folder of schoolwork strewn across the dining table, she hollered my name because she knew Purple = Paige.

And it certainly solved the problem of the communal toothbrush!

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On Saturday, I went to the store and bought myself a new toothbrush. I decided ahead of time to purchase purple. It was safer to go with a color I could remember belonged to me.

As I stood there in the store, looking at all the toothbrushes, I felt a twinge of jealously. There are no colors starting with the letter J, which means Jon has far more color options than me.  Lime green. Teal blue. Bright red. Flashy orange. Why, I suppose he could pick a new color every single time he needs a new toothbrush!

Meanwhile, I’ve been using purple (or sometimes pink) toothbrushes most of my life. I would like a little variety from time to time. But experience has taught me the hard way, and right there on the toothbrush aisle of Walmart I realized the importance of sticking  with a system that actually works. So purple it is … because Purple = Paige.

As I reached out to pick out a purple toothbrush from the rack, I was struck with the thought that I have my mom to thank for teaching me this life lesson. She’s a wise woman who taught me many, many things  … but I bet that she never thought she would have to teach her children how to keep up with which toothbrush belonged to them!

Isn’t parenting odd like that?

You find yourself saying things to your children that you never imagined you would have to say out loud to another person.

“Of course, if you stick rocks up your nose you won’t be able to breath.”

“Plastic dishes are not oven-safe.”

“Quit brushing your hair with your toothbrush!”

As parents, we are constantly teaching our children. We train them in a myriad of ways, giving them daily lessons on a wide variety of topics, from the obviously big ones (how to manage money) to the insanely ridiculous ones (don’t share your toothbrush). We hope when our children leave us, they don’t forget the important lessons we’ve taught them over the years. It’s why I am so grateful for the assurance God gives us in the proverbs:

Train up a child in the way he should go;
Even when he is old he will not depart from it.

~Proverbs 22:6

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My oldest biological child is turning 18 tomorrow. 

Eighteen.

My word.

He’s not nearly old enough to be eighteen. Yet somehow he is … and that boggles my mind!

Anyway, I’ve been doing a lot of contemplating lately:  Have I taught my son everything he needs to know to be prepared for life? What did I forget to tell him that he absolutely has to know before he leaves for college in the fall? Does he know how to jump his car, change a flat tire, cook a fried egg, or sew on a button? Is he prepared for adulthood?

I’ve been seeing a lot on social media lately about how the millennial generation doesn’t have many of the basic life skills that previous generations had. “Adulting” classes are actually gaining popularity. It’s rather sad to me that this is a needed thing, and at the same time it causes me to stop and ponder how well I’ve done at teaching my son the skills he will need to live a successful life.

Deep down, I know the biggest life lessons I need to have taught my son are simple:

  1. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind.
  2. Seek first the kingdom of God.
  3. Let the Lord direct your paths.

When he was born, I started teaching him about the Lord, and over the years I have prayed daily for him to know these truths.  I know that if he has these lessons down, if his focus is on the right things, if his faith is intact … well, then everything will turn okay, even if he doesn’t know how to sew on a button.

Although, now that I think of it, maybe I would add just one more lesson to that list:

Never share your toothbrush.

 

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